It’s back….

September 28, 2007

Talk about



  1. I’m not superstitious… but I am a little stitious.

  2. -Has anyone done anything to any indian burial grounds?
    -Like What?
    -Like, have you parked your car on any graves or dug up any bodies?…Toby?

  3. Michael: Kelly, you’re a Hindu, so you believe in Buddha.
    Kelly: That’s Buddhists.
    Michael: Are you sure?
    Kelly: No.

  4. It is up to me to get rid of the curse that hit Meredith with my car.

  5. “Double Jeopardy, so we’re fine” “That’s not how Jeopardy works.” “Oh, I’m sorry. What is we’re fine?”

    Dwight to Angela “well, you left your tv on and your cat’s dead”.

    Michael Scott’s Dunder Mifflin Scranton Meredith Palmer Memorial Celebrity Rabies Awareness Pro-Am Fun Run Race for the Cure

    “She already looked that way. That’s not my fault.”

    “Support the rabid”

  6. Chafing nipples is a vicious circle.

  7. “This is the face of rabies.”

  8. “Or maybe the head of a monkey…..with the antlers of a deer….and the body…..of a porcupine.” (I just love how serious he was being while thinking of that…)

    “They’re like PB&J. Pam Beesley and Jim. What a waste!”

    “I’m feeding him peanuts. Look at how happy he is!”

    “And later I threw up my guts, but I didn’t throw up my heart.”

  9. >> “Or maybe the head of a monkey…..with the antlers
    >> of a deer….and the body…..of a porcupine.” (I just
    >> love how serious he was being while thinking of
    >> that…)

    I loved how that was like, the third combination he came up with.

  10. Not the funniest episode by any means, but there were some gems.

    He once killed an entire family of raccoons.

  11. Hey, man, you know if we’re gonna get some red bull in this thing? Sometimes you just need to ride the bull, you know what I mean? (Paraphrased)

  12. My favorite of the night was…
    Andy: Tuna! (sigh) Tuna,tuna,tuna
    Kevin: Tuna,tuna,tuna
    Andy: He has a killer job. He’s rich. He smells like what I think Pierce Brosnan Smells Like. He wears rich guy clothes.
    Kevin: And he can get any girl that he wants
    Andy: So, sorry Tuna, but if you don’t know why that’s awesome, then…you need awesome lessons. See ya Tuna.
    Kevin: Tuna. Check ya later.

  13. “And he smells like what I think Pierce Brosnan would smell like…..If you don’t think that’s awesome, than you need awesome lessons.”

    “Computers are all about trying to murder people by drowning them in lakes.”

    “Kids grow up so fast….I have a couple…that I’d like to have someday.”

  14. “This is a day that will live in infamy.”

    Poor Toby though– “That’s only for ‘relationships,’ so, if it’s just a casual thing… Let’s just wait, see what happens.”

    and I liked “I don’t see it. I think they both could do better.”

    and “I heard a joke today.”
    “Oh! That’s funny.”
    “Yes, it was.”

  15. so many funny lines tonight:
    “My Grandpa Manheim is 103. I tried to visit him in Argentina but my travel visa was protested by the Shoah Foundation.”

    “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks. because its illegal. and you’ll go to jail.”

    ”If they knew how much I was paying for my haircut now, they wouldn’t be giving me a noogie”

    “this is a day that will live in infamy.”

    “Let the bells of Dunder-Mifflin chime out your love.”

    “Guess who just became the best looking single guy in the office.”

    “The only thing that could madke this day better is ice cream.”

    “Hello, Mr. sonny Crockett.”

    (I can’t wait to use this one on Dad) “What if we don’t want to use a Blackberry because they are stupid and pointless?”

    “I couldn’t see your hands.”

    “a fake brother who steals your jeans” (from the country now known as the former Yugoslavia.)

    “cauliflower and noodles, with a baked potato on the side.”

    “The printer was out if ink” (cut to Creed’s hair)

    “Don’t look in my eyes. Look right here. It’s an old sales trick.”

    Kelly’s whiny, “Why not???”

    Gift baskets are the “essence of class and fanciness.”

    It has to be said again, both Tiffanys” “he smells like what I think Pierce Brosnan smells like.” and “you need awesome lessons.”

    “I have a few of my own (children) that I want some day.”

    “Make a u-turn if possible.”

    “Where are the turtles??”

    Sorry I had so many. I loved this episode.

  16. ” . . . and FYI, I eventually aced second grade and I was the biggest kid in the class”

  17. My favorite was the gift baskets one. They totally are the essence of class and fanciness.

  18. Don’t be sorry for so many, Mom, the more the better!

    We actually watched the episode again at lunch at work here today, and it was funnier the second time around for me. Really a good episode, after all.

  19. Why do people hate old people so much?
    Because they’re lame!

  20. What is a Jim?

  21. First of all…I loved the whole DVD hitting the corner thing…because I totally do that. And by that I mean…I watch the DVD thing and hope it hits the corner.

    What am I supposed to do? And if you tell me drive back to Scranton I’m going to throw up. Okay…I’m throwing up. You’re making me throw up.

    “I wanted to get Oh, The Places You’ll Go! but they were sold out. So, I got this. I figured that its the same kind of stuff inside.” “It’s not…but still a good book.”

    So why don’t you stop bothering our sweet little Miss Kapur about 500 sheets of paper, and go back to your desk and sell multiple reams like a man?

    During the time it took you to type that I searched every database everywhere and learned everything there is to know about everything and mastered the violin. Oh…and sold more paper.

  22. Phyllis . . . these are spoooons. Spoons have rounded tops and are used to scoop things. What we need are forks, which have prongs or tiny spears on top and we need knives which have blades . . . Do you understand me now?

    You’re also welcome to date Toby.

  23. “Oh my gosh…I kidnapped a kid.” “You had to. What other choice did you have?” “I could’ve paid for the pizzas!” “Well…yeah…”

    “I’m an adult. I don’t have to think about or do anything.”

  24. I am late this week, and many great lines have been given, but I have a few more.

    “the website is my brain grandchild.”

    Stanley, “Yes, please let us know.” (whether Ryan is dating anyone

    I loved when Michael called Angela Pipsquak, booster Seat, and said, “if you are not this tall, you may not ride the rollercoaster.”

    Ryan’s whole clip with all the business cliches like “at the end of the day” “it is what it is” “buying paper just became fun”

    “I can’t tell if he’s mocking me.”

    “I googled how to deal with difficult people.”

    “Corporate gave me two plaques in lieu of a pay raise.”

    “This is like when the freshmen throw a party and won’t let any of the seniors go.”

    “I’m not going to cry over it. I did that in the car on the way home.”

    “It’s like eating a hot circle of garbage.”

    “You looking for dinner and a movie because you are not going to find it in that box.”

    “Because some town in switzerland says so, you have rights.”

    “And give a generous tip — no more than ten percent.”

  25. Ha ha ha ha ha.

    The DVD bouncing part was clearly my favorite.


  27. That’s awesome mom.

    Instead of a quote, I just want you to imagine cousin Mose running alongside Jim’s car.

  28. I thought this whole episode had a lot of great visuals. Mose running by the car was my favorite, but there was also all the activities on the farm, Andy standing v-legged beside Pam’s desk, Michael leaving the second job with his fist in the air, storytime with Mose there too. I could enjoy this episode without any dialogue.
    There were some great lines too. The whole whoever/whomever debate was one of my favorite scenes ever.
    Some other lines:

    “Why don’t you just pretend you have a car?”
    “I was recently scrubbing my room of memories…”
    “You wouldn’t understand…it’s a secret.”
    “It’s more of a hobby. some people have golf or relaxing.”
    Michael being sassy in the meeting: “Very inspirational.”
    “I always imagined less manure — I mean sure, some manure, but less.”
    “I hope this conversation has helped.”
    “I am better than you have ever been or ever will be.”
    “Honestly, it was unlikely that I was ever going to figure this out anyway.”
    “Don’t forget to disinfect your headset.”
    “I have moonwalked past accounting like ten times.”
    “Who says exactly what they are thinking? What kind of game is that?”

  29. The whoever/whomever debate was great. As were all of those quotes. I’m glad I can count on you to come up with a nice list mom. 🙂

  30. I’ll bet that isn’t what most people count on their mothers for, but I am glad I am good for something!

  31. One of the cutest little asparagus farms you’ll ever see.

  32. “And this scary black bar are things that no one should ever buy ever.”

  33. Also, I really liked the manure comment. And the fight in the meeting. And Jim saying that he was in love with Italian food. And storytime. And Michael singing “Runaway Train” on the train.

  34. “You need to access your uncrazy side”

    “He’s very passionate about Italian food.”

  35. Break me off a piece of that FANCY FEAST!
    Oh yeah! It was cat food! Nailed it!

    (Again, don’t remember the EXACT quote.)

  36. here is my weekly recap:
    I loved the whole kit kat thing, but my favorite was “break me off a piece of that football cream!”
    “You just got Nard dogged.”
    “What about me seems urban to you?”
    “oh, it has losers.”
    “Five years old! couldn’t even talk yet.”
    “I’m on, Michael.”
    “I’m willing to stake my entire reputation on it.”
    “My nick name in high school used to be Kool-Aid man.” (I wish I could reproduce the smile on here.)
    “Oscar, I want you to do costume design obviously.”
    “huge couP”
    “I hate being titillated.”
    “I was under the impression this would be a rap.” “What’s rap?” “I’ll make you a mix.”
    (Wasn’t that song and singing great, by the way?)
    “Did you or di you not get Sue Grafton?”
    “Oh Deeeee”

  37. My favorite was totally Darryl’s songs. Those things rocked. I loved Creed rocking out especially.

    My favorite Kit Kat one was, “Break me off a piece of that applesauce!” “Break me off a piece of that applesauce?”

    “And thus I sealed my own fate….for good.”

    I really liked Michael’s commercial too. I made me happy. 🙂

  38. Yes, it’s football cream. Let’s move on.

  39. (none of these are exact probably…but I thought this episode was pretty darn funny)

    “bleh…Toby is the worst. I can’t do this. I was bluffing.”

    “Jim, if I don’t make it out of this, promise me one thing….host the Dundies.”

    “Finer things is the most exclusive club in this office, so naturally I must be a part of it. The Party Planning Committee is my backup. Kevin’s band is my safety.”

    “If you harm one hair on Stanley’s head….we will burn Utica to the ground.”

    “Yes Jim…please tell me MORE about how happy you and Pam are.”

  40. -If I see a security, I’ll stab him in the eye with this oversized chalk
    -No, you can’t do that.
    -Well, then I’ll grind up the chalk into powder and blow it into his eye.
    -No, you can’t do anything to his eyes.

    -The eyes are the groin of the head.

  41. ”easy…when your boss isn’t an idiot and your boyfriend’s not in love with someone else.”

    ”I don’t understand why sleeping at your desk is better than you being here”

    ”Someone needs to clean it. It smells like popcorn.”

    : Middle-aged black man with sass. Big butt, bigger heart.”

    ”Fly away, sweet little bird! Fly away and be free.”

    M – “We’re in a stariwell.” D – “We’re climbing some starirs.” M – “I’m breathing heavily.”

    “mo money, mo problems”

    “we are going to make Karen wish she was never dumped by you.”

  42. That very last one was one of my very favorites. 🙂

  43. “Didn’t all the Stanford people quit right away?”
    “No, I fired them…and you’re next. So…what do you say?”

  44. “That’s what she said.” “That’s what who said?” “I never know.”

    “I would cut out your teeth and cut off all of your fingertips so no one would be able to identify your body. I would be known as the Overkill Killer.”
    “Okay, you are as creepy as a creepy serial killer.”

  45. Mr. A. Knife

  46. Hats off to the writers of this funny, funny show. I hope the strike is settled soon.

    This was a good episode for Creed. His whole scene with Jim discussing the cobbler, the scene in the break room ending with “come on, gang!’, his joy as the birthday boy, eating the whole cobbler – all funny. Best line – “tell her it’s for Creed, she’ll know what you mean.”

    “No more s’mores!”

    “Hey, nobody cares.”

    “Michael wasn’t invited.”

    “It’s better to be hurt by someone you know accidentally than by a stranger on purpose.”

    “I will even let him die, but I will never let him lose his dignity.”


    “I have been without food for a good three hours or so.”

    “Most days I just sit and wait for the break.”

    “The safety is (click) on.”

    “I don’t see any harm in that.” (Toby and then Jim)

  47. Agreed mom. This strike business is no fun.

    Here’s the thing, though… is the “No more s’mores!” thing supposed to be funny because it’s really NOT funny, or do Tiffany and I just not get it? 😦

  48. Agreed mom. This strike business is no fun.

    Here’s the thing, though… is the “No more s’mores!” thing supposed to be funny because it’s really NOT funny, or do Tiffany and I just not get it? 😦

  49. That’s the thing. It is so ridiculously corny. I think it shows a glimpse of toby’s personality, and also I think people were relishing in Michael not being invited and acting like toby was more fascinating than he is. that’s my take on it.
    also, that last conversation between Michael and Jim was one of my favorite scenes ever.
    On a related note, Erica and I saw Dan in Real Life today. We loved it, loved it, loved it. I laughed, I cried, I enjoyed every minute.

  50. Ok, that’s good. I can buy ridiculously corny.

    I loved the end scene too. Another couple parts I had forgotten are Dwight hitting Michael with his shoe and Creed “skipping around the room”. 🙂

  51. “My friend Pat took a turn.”

    “Not leave anything to chance or Michael’s judgment.”

    “Were Jim’s parents first cousins who were also bad at ping pong?”

    “the timing was nothing short of predominant.”

    “all of my heroes are table tennis players.”

    “Could you make it eleven?” (copies of the diary , asks Toby.)

    “Ryan is just as hot as Jan, but in a different way.”

    Funny visuals- Ryan’s facial hair clones, Dwight’s no look slam of Jim’s spin serve, and his playing ping pong with Mose at the end, Michael pushing toby’s food of fthe table, Jan’s hair after the top down car ride.

  52. Crap, I don’t remember what the “friend Pat” joke was about.

    Lots of funny parts here. I would LOVE to memorize the whole part where Dwight talks about his ping pong heroes.

  53. From how Michael was trying to remember “a pattern of disrespect” etc. Pat – tern – my friend Pat took a turn.

  54. Oh YEAH!

  55. Okay…I LOVED Michael pushing Toby’s food off the table. It CRACKED ME UP! Also, I loved the whole read back of Michael trying to get out of answering the question.

  56. I thought the food pushing was hilarious, but it also made me die a little bit inside. Michael is really a horrible person, despite how they try to trick us every one in a while. 😉

  57. That is the greatness of the Michael character. He is so complex. He is not a cliche. He makes us cringe, laugh, smile, cry, think, compare, be astonished, etc.

  58. Yeah, good point mom.

  59. very interesting. i’m adding in RSS Reader

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